I’ve been on Whole30 for 12 days. According to the Whole30 timeline, this is when people quit–the newness has worn off and all around you are things you can’t eat. And that’s what I’ve experienced in the last couple days. Today the kids got some gummies from the store. I picked out a couple for each child and had SUCH a desire to just pop one in my mouth. A couple even fell out in the bag, and instead of eating them, I put them back into the jar. The biggest adjustment for me last time I did Whole30 and this time has been coffee. I normally have milk and sugar in my coffee. Since going off milk with M, I was using coconut milk, but I was still definitely putting some type of sweetener in my coffee. To go black, or with just coconut milk, makes me sad. Coffee is no longer something I truly enjoy drinking in the morning–it’s more something I drink now so I can stay awake. However, if I have time to sit and enjoy a cup, I found that eating a date or two with it will make it taste good again–it’s like eating a cookie with black coffee, something that I would do periodically pre-Whole30.
The thing that makes this change worth it is that it’s helping M. If I were doing Whole30 just because I wanted to change my diet, I would have quit a week into it. It’s so difficult at this stage in my life. I have 4 young kids, one who is 4 months old, so spending hours making a lot of meals just isn’t something I have time for. However, I am making time because it’s helping M. It really is. From the first day when she started eating better, until now when she still has a great appetite and is gaining weight again and eating at normal intervals, I can truly see the benefits of what I’m eating. It’s just hard making every single dinner the way that I used to before getting pregnant. Since pregnancy, I’ve done easier meals. We’ve always eaten homemade, but I wasn’t as creative because I didn’t have the energy or the time. Now though, we’re having homemade cauliflower rice again, and zucchini noodles, and all kinds of healthy foods. Our veggie drawer is constantly stocked, as well as our fruit bowl. Although it can get expensive, we’re saving money on all the coffee and fast food that is NOT being bought outside the house, so it pretty much evens itself out.
It’s also been interesting for me to see the power of self-control. When I was growing up, we didn’t really have a lot of snacks in the house. My mom would make chocolate chip cookies, but because they were always there, they weren’t tempting for me. I was drawn to the store-bought sugar treats like Oreos, any Little Debbie treat, or sugar cereal. We almost NEVER had those in the house so when we did, I would eat a lot of them. Since living on my own, those things haven’t been a part of my weekly purchase, but if they were in the house or I treated us to them ever so often, I would again eat a lot. Since Whole30 though, there has been sugary treats in our pantry that I have not eaten. Case in point–the gummies from today. Or the Hershey candy bar that John bought at Aldi’s American themed week. Or the chocolate-covered biscuits that have been there for the last few weeks. They’re still there, either to give to our guests, or for our kids or John to snack on, but I haven’t touched them. It’s encouraging to see my self-control grow in that area, especially if I see the benefit it has on M. Without dairy, or sugar, or grains, or whatever was affecting her tummy, she is happier, less gassy, and sleeps (slightly) better. She’s still congested, but even that isn’t as bad. And she still wakes up a couple times at night, but it’s not as much from gas as it used to be.
One thing I’m looking forward to in Whole30 is the “tiger blood” that’s supposed to come before or after Day 21. That’s when the healthy eating and good fueling of your body is supposed to kick up your energy and make you thankful you stuck it out for 3 weeks. I can’t WAIT for that energy because I need it! I’ve been dragging for the last week and a half, and I’m sure the kids are excited to have an energy-filled Mama!
I’ve seen just how much food affects me, but especially those times that I’m having a rough day and want to treat myself to a coffee. As you can tell, coffee is a big part of my life. It’s a big part of society here as well. People stop what they’re doing at 10.30 and 3.30 for a “cuppa,” which I really enjoy. Wherever you go on outings, you stop and have a cuppa with your family either before, during, or after your event. When we went to the Children’s Museum this past week, I was so sad I couldn’t have a latte from the nearby cafe. When I drop E off at preschool, I mourn the loss of my periodic latte from the attached cafe. When we drive around doing errands, we can’t stop and get a coffee. Or when the kids are getting on my last nerve, John, as a surprise, can’t go out and get me a conciliatory coffee. Yeah, I drink a lot of coffee. And yes, we’re saving a lot of money not going out and buying it. But I miss it so much. It’s just a part of my day here, and I miss that comfort, that vacation in a cup. I know I’ll get through and will have to continue to get through past the 30 days because of how it’s helping M, but I’m grieving my coffee.
So, all this to say, I’m surviving but grieving. And I’ll probably continue to be in this mode for awhile. 😀